Feeling Stuck? Here's How to Take Control of Your Life
Let’s get real: life can feel like a total drag sometimes. You wake up, go through the same motions every day, and wonder if this is really it. You might have a decent job, a stable routine, and people around you, but something feels off. People at work or in your personal life throw out those little comments that bug you—passive-aggressive digs, subtle jabs—and you just stand there, unsure of how to respond. Then, you replay those moments in your head, feeling angrier and more upset with yourself for not saying something or handling it better.
Sound familiar? You’re not alone. A lot of people hit a wall where life feels repetitive, frustrating, and like something’s missing. Maybe you’ve been pushing down those feelings, hoping they’ll go away, but let’s be honest—things aren’t going to change unless you do something about it. The good news? You can do something about it. It starts with acknowledging that where you are right now doesn’t have to be where you stay.
What’s the Real Problem?
From the outside, your life might look fine. You’ve got a job, a place to live, and people around you. You’re checking all the boxes, doing what’s expected. But on the inside? It’s a different story. You feel restless, unhappy, like something’s just… off. Maybe it’s the way those little, passive-aggressive remarks from coworkers or family dig into you. Maybe it’s the nagging anger you have toward yourself for past decisions—those “what if” moments that you can’t stop replaying. Every day feels like a repeat of the last, and no matter how much you want things to change, you’re stuck in the same routine.
The truth is, the real problem isn’t just what’s happening outside—it’s what’s happening inside. Those external annoyances, those frustrations—they’re symptoms of a bigger issue: feeling like you’re not in control of your own life anymore. You know you deserve better. You know you’re capable of more. But figuring out how to break out of this cycle? That’s the hard part. It’s not just about wanting things to be different; it’s about taking action to make things different.
Here’s a Plan to Help You Get Unstuck
Ready to break out of the rut? Look, you don’t need some magic moment or a big “aha” revelation to get started. Change happens when you decide to make it happen, not when life decides to hand you a perfect opportunity. If you wait around for things to get better on their own, you’ll be stuck waiting forever. So, let’s stop making excuses. Here’s a simple, actionable plan to help you start turning things around today:
Focus on What You Can Control
Here’s the truth: a lot of the stuff that bothers you—the rude comments, the passive-aggressive behavior, other people’s bad attitudes—that’s all outside your control. Trying to change other people is a losing game. But what is in your control? Your response. You get to choose how much energy and time you give those things. So the next time someone throws shade or makes a snide comment, stop and ask yourself, “Is this really worth my energy?” Nine times out of ten, it’s not.
Instead of letting those moments ruin your day, shift your focus to things that actually matter—things that make you feel better or move you forward. That might mean stepping away from toxic conversations, setting stronger boundaries, or simply refusing to give attention to things that don’t deserve it. Your time and energy are valuable—start treating them that way.
Extend Your Action Step:
For the next week, practice this: when something frustrating happens, pause for a moment and ask, “Is this worth it?” If it’s not, walk away—mentally, emotionally, or even physically. This small shift can make a huge difference in how much energy you waste on things that don’t serve you.
Take Small Steps Every Day
Here’s a common trap: you wait for the “perfect” time to make a big change in your life. Newsflash—that perfect moment isn’t coming. The people who make progress don’t wait for the stars to align; they take small, consistent actions every single day. Small steps might not seem like much at first, but they’re what build momentum. Over time, those small actions compound into real, noticeable change.
Start by focusing on what you can do right now. Maybe it’s 10 minutes of self-care each day—whether that’s a walk, meditation, or journaling. Maybe it’s writing down one goal for the week and breaking it into tiny, manageable tasks. The key is to stop overthinking and start doing. Once you get moving, even in small ways, you’ll start to feel the shift.
Extend Your Action Step:
Pick one small action that you can commit to every day for the next month. It could be as simple as setting aside time each morning to reflect, doing a daily workout, or making one small change to your routine. Don’t underestimate the power of these small steps. Over time, they create the momentum that leads to bigger, lasting change.
Think About What Can Go Right
So many people walk through life bracing for the next bad thing to happen. It’s like they’re constantly waiting for the other shoe to drop. That kind of thinking? It becomes a self-fulfilling prophecy. When you expect the worst, you start seeing the worst in everything. But what if, just for a second, you flipped the script and started thinking about what could actually go right?
Start asking yourself: “What if things work out? What if I succeed?” It might feel strange at first, especially if you’re used to expecting the worst. But this shift in mindset can change everything. When you focus on what can go right, you start looking for opportunities, not obstacles. You start planning for success, not failure.
Extend Your Action Step:
Spend five minutes every morning visualizing what your life could look like if things went right—whether it’s in your health, finances, or relationships. What would that version of your life feel like? What steps would you need to take to get there? Write down one thing you can do today to move in that direction, no matter how small it is.
Scenario 1: Setting Boundaries with a Toxic Coworker
Character: Sarah, a mid-level manager at a company, often deals with Greg, a coworker who constantly makes subtle, passive-aggressive comments during meetings. He undermines her ideas with snide remarks, and it’s been wearing on her confidence for months.
The Challenge: Sarah usually stays quiet when Greg speaks up, letting the comments slide because she doesn’t want to cause conflict. But each time, she feels more frustrated and starts to doubt herself.
The Win: This time, instead of staying silent, Sarah focuses on what she can control—her response. When Greg tries to cut her down with another passive-aggressive remark during a meeting, she calmly addresses it in the moment. She says, “Greg, I’m hearing some frustration in your comment. Let’s make sure we’re all on the same page so we can move forward.” The room goes quiet, and Greg’s tactic backfires. Sarah’s calm, direct response takes the power away from him, and her team takes her suggestion seriously. By addressing the problem head-on, Sarah sets a boundary and reclaims her confidence.
Scenario 2: Overcoming Self-Doubt and Taking Action
Character: Mike, a 45-year-old who feels stuck in a routine. He’s been wanting to start his own side business for years, but fear of failure and uncertainty have kept him from taking any action. He’s watched others around him make bold moves while he stays in the same place, frustrated.
The Challenge: Mike has been waiting for the perfect time to start—thinking that once he has everything lined up, he’ll take the plunge. But deep down, he knows the "right" moment is never going to come. He’s been stuck in a loop of overthinking and inaction for too long.
The Win: Mike realizes that small steps are what lead to progress, not waiting for some perfect moment. He decides to stop overthinking and takes the first step by setting up a simple website for his business. It’s not perfect, and he’s nervous, but it’s done. Over the next few weeks, he dedicates time every day to improving his idea. As he takes small actions, his confidence grows. Mike is finally moving forward, and though he knows there will be bumps in the road, he feels empowered by the fact that he’s taken control of his future.
Scenario 3: Flipping the Script on a Negative Mindset
Character: Jenny, a 38-year-old single mom who’s always preparing for the worst. She constantly expects bad things to happen—whether it’s at work, with her finances, or in her personal life. This mindset has kept her from seeing opportunities and enjoying life.
The Challenge: Jenny’s boss announces new job openings within the company, and immediately, she assumes she won’t get the promotion. She tells herself it’s pointless to even try, convinced that something will go wrong if she applies. She’s done this before—talked herself out of opportunities because of her negative thinking.
The Win: Instead of giving in to her usual mindset, Jenny stops herself and thinks, “What if things actually go right this time? What if I’m the best candidate for the job?” For the first time in a long time, she allows herself to visualize success. She applies for the promotion, giving it her best shot. To her surprise, she gets an interview. Jenny’s shift in mindset doesn’t guarantee she’ll get the job, but it’s a massive win because she’s finally stopped sabotaging herself with negative expectations. She’s opened the door to new opportunities, and that’s a victory in itself.
Life is full of challenges, but the real difference between staying stuck and moving forward is how you choose to face them. You’ve already got the tools inside you to take control—whether it’s setting boundaries, taking small steps every day, or shifting your mindset from expecting the worst to planning for success. The key is to stop waiting for the perfect moment and start taking action now. The more you push yourself out of your comfort zone and tackle those tough situations head-on, the more empowered and unstoppable you’ll become.
You don’t have to have everything figured out today. But the next decision you make could be the one that changes everything. The power is in your hands.
So, what’s the next bold move you’re going to make to start living life on your own terms?
Ready to Take Control? Shift Strategy